Believe....

Well, today is the New Year. Day 1. Somehow, I am finding it hard to say HAPPY new year.... it just doesn't feel like I can say it, at least not to people who know where we are at. Today was a hard day.... many tears. Tears aren't the hard part... they seem to come very easily. The hard part is trying to make sense of "people" and things that affect my/our life/lives.

Last night we went to a Lynda Randle concert.... we were in a predominantly older crowd, but Alvin and I love her rich alto voice. We are Gaither fans, which is where we know her from. Her concert blessed us.

It was a challenge to my heart. At one point, during the song IT IS WELL WITH MY SOUL - with eyes shut, my arm lifted toward God... I felt like I had to acknowledge that I know that He is my strength, yes, even though I feel so weak. At one point I was wondering how much more crippled I need to be, before He will take me and raise me up. Right now I am certainly struggling more than not, but I know He is in the struggle too. I believe it will make sense one day.

So, this year, I would like to photograph a moment from each day.... as well as to journal in my beautiful new journal that I bought at the craft sale. I was so excited to finally write in it. Lord, be my strength, and help me to see you through my journal entries....

So today, I want to begin with a photograph of an ornament on our kitchen tree... it just has ornaments on it that relate to Jay and our prayers... this one is just BELIEVE.
Lord, I need to believe that YOU CAN... and YOU WILL.
Like the leper, I come to you and plead... Lord, if you are willing...

I need to believe that He is FAITHFUL... even when it feels like we are abandoned and cast off. God, You are faithful. My head recalls your faithfulness...

With that, I want to write the words from one of Lynda's songs....

FAITHFUL
Through valleys dark and oceans wide
When storms assail, attacked from every side
When hope give way to doubt and fear
And even what we know is true, is hard to hear
Faithful, He is faithful
Even when we cannot see beyond the pain
Faithful, our God is faithful
When mountains crumble, His faithfulness remains
When hearts break and roads end
When troubles come time and time again
When plans change and dreams fade
When all you thought was sure slips away
Faithful, He is faithful
Even when we cannot see beyond the pain
Faithful, our God is faithful
When mountains crumble, His faithfulness remains.


Lord God, MY Lord, My God... you are faithful
I give you this year, and yes all it holds.
I pray that you would turn your face toward us - that you would be gracious unto us, that you would bless us, and that you would also give us the desire of our hearts. Lord you know our hearts desire. Lord, please have mercy, please hear our prayer. O Lord, faithful one.... hear our prayer.
amen