a sampling of thoughts

I have been thinking alot
many more thoughts than answers these days
and that's okay I guess

here is a sampling of my thoughts

• I love autumn.  I love the colors.  I hate it when it gets cold and rainy and the leaves get blown off before they really have a chance to really shine!
• darn - I have a love/hate relationship with the snow.  Hate the first snow because it makes me tense when I drive.  However I love the sight of the flakes loftily falling to the ground.  I wonder - if I was dead still ... would I be able to hear the flakes falling?
• autumn is bittersweet season for me.  Love the sights/smells/sounds of autumn.  But it is a reminder of things past - such as the year I took off as I worked through my depression - or the thanksgiving meal I shared with my dad, only to have him suffer a massive heart attach and die just a mere couple weeks later.  It is however full of smells - like burning stubble, which takes me back to the year I lived at the cottage for a few months, and commuted to Beausejour to school, and often smelled and saw the stubble burning. 
• Geese - I love watching them.  I love listening to them.  I love it when they pass over and you can actually hear their powerful wings flapping.  
• I have given my notice at my job, which although it was permanent parttime - 22.5 hours biweekly - somehow it morphed into many more.  Giving notice was a very hard thing to do.  I love these people I work with.  I love the job.  I love what Canadian Blood Services stands for and does.  Giving notice is another bittersweet thing I had to do.
• I love that soon I will be able to hold and cuddle and kiss the sweet cheeks of another little grandbabe!  Ashley is in the last month of her pregnancy.  Somehow, i think she is going to be early and have this little one sooner than the due date.  Maybe because I was and her pregnancy is alot like mine.  Time will tell.
• I love being surrounded by the lively antics of my family!  Never a dull moment - banter among the boys, the girls helping me talk out plans for the retreat ministry, and our sweet grandsons - the smiles, the kisses, the new things that they learn.  Aw - gotta love being a granny!

More thoughts ...

• Parlour coffee makes amazing latte's with amazing coffee art (there is likely a more sophisticated name!  One of the greatest cups of coffee I have had in a very long time!  Greatest.  Gotta check them out - by the old Birt's Saddlery building, on Main, and ?? is it McDermot?  or one of those.
• I am so thankful for friends who stand in the gap for others - and become intercessory prayer warriors.  I am so thankful I can pray for others.  At times when we feel the most helpless - the best thing we can do is pray.
• I picked out "vintage" material ... and it reminded me of a housecoat my mom made for me.  I miss my mom so much.
• I weep for a friend who is having a brutal encounter - or should I say journey - with cancer.  Absolutely brutal.  I know that God brought her and her husband into our lives - and sometimes I struggle with the "why" of her cancer.  I asked her the other day if she ever felt angry (because honestly, I have never noticed any anger) to which she replied no.  She also said something very profound ... that really she thinks "why NOT me".  It brings the reality of how fragile our lives are - right up front and personal!  As God lays her and her family on my heart - I pray.  I also weep.  Alot.

and,

more thoughts.

• I have been on a search for doc marten's shoes - and found them.  And bought them.  And wear them.  I really like them - although they are not the most feminine - but comfy!
• I love skype!  It is free and I get to SEE who I am talking with!  Love that.
• I want to take guitar lessons - and just need to figure out when.  I got a guitar from my kids for Christmas.
• I am dreaming about where Alvin and I may go - to rest.  The kids are really encouraging us to "rest" and just "be" between finishing the house - and beginning ministry in it.  Time will tell - but boy - there are alot of options out there.
• I have made some of the biggest purchases ever ... and it is fun but not fun.  Does that make sense?  Sometimes I make the decision, then second guess.  Hmmm.
• I really really want to go to see our missionary friends in Thailand again. Lord willing.
• We had bought a semi trailer to store our stuff in - and today - it left the yard!  WOOHOOO... it looks wonderful to have it gone.

and even more ...

• I carry my camera - because I just see God all over my day!  I am thankful.
• lots of people seem to be searching for happiness.  God, help me to be content in whatever situation I am in.
• I still want to be a morning person.
• I still struggle BEING a morning person.
• I can hardly believe that in a month (give or take) we will get to hold our 4th grandbaby.  I can hardly wait
• Everett makes me laugh with his antics - there is something new each time I see him
• Rogie - warms my heart with his perpetual smile!  That little guy is so happy - thank you Lord!
• watching Ashley being pregnant, reminds me of me (she is much like me) and well - I can hardly believe my "baby" is having a "baby".  Where does time go?
• I love turnip puffs, and cold glasses of milk. (that's what I had for supper!  Thanksgiving always means that my sister will make her reknown TURNIP PUFF for us!  Yum

and a final thought or two ...

• it is after midnite - I did not turn into a pumpkin - but I am tired.  SO gotta hit the hay!
• I will fall asleep praying - thinking of my friend who is no doubt fast asleep - sore and exhausted from a day full of scans, and biopsies, and blood tests.
• I will fall asleep thinking of all that I have to be thankful for.  Family - Friends - and my Lord Jesus
• the thoughts will come and come and come until I am alseep.  

Morning comes early!  Night.