bittersweet

Last Sunday was a bittersweet day
of remembering
of missing
of tears
of laughter
of song
of spoken words
of hugs
of shoveled mud
of flowers
of helium balloons set free

Last Sunday
it was 17 years since I said good-bye to my mom
oh how I miss her so
and because my niece (as the firstborn)
had a special love for Granny
they intentionally chose May 5th as the burial date

this was the back of the stone
words could never be more true!

Last Sunday
I stood at the open grave in a quiet country cemetery
and performed the service of my niece
and we laid her ashes to rest
oh how we miss her so too!

Bittersweet
the place where remembering love
and big smiles
warm hugs and
sweet words
remembering laughter and joy
but also all too present sorrow and sadness

Her sister brought balloons
and as each one let go of theirs
as a tribute towards our sweet niece
we watched
as they scooted past the trees and up over them
and towards the lake

We are constantly reminded
that life is but a vapor...
that our days are ordained for us
before even one comes to be

We are constantly reminded that this world
is full of joy and sorrow
of happiness and sadness
of completeness and of brokenness

We are constantly reminded that God -
Sovereign God
knows all
and is in charge

And as we left that day
walking across the field towards our cars
i knew that while this portion was completed
the rest of the journey is one that will last our whole lives
until we are together again
in heaven
with those we love, whom Jesus has called home.

And i was reminded again
that we grieve
but not as others who have no hope
Jesus is our hope.
And in my heart
I smiled
BITTERSWEET
smiles

till we are together again in heaven sweet one ...
I miss you
I love you
always will