clay

clay...

i am a jar of clay

a one of a kind

cracked, broken but redeemed

light shines through the cracks

fragile

could be broken again

that is always known

and yet not held in fear.

i am a priceless vessel

made uniquely by the great Potter

fragile and yet i do not want to just sit on the shelf

looked at and collecting dust

unusable

no!

i want to be used

poured into

poured through

poured out

not saved for special occasions but rather treasured but used.

the Potter shapes

handles

molds

repairs

restores

pours into and out of

His touch creates and makes beautiful.

clay

from dust you came

to dust you'll return

a reminder of being ordinary

made extraordinary

simple

yet strong

of the earth ~ which He also created.

But now O Lord, you are our Father

We are the clay and you are the Potter!

we are all the work of your hand.  (Isaiah 45:9)

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all surpassing power is from God and not from us!  (2 Cor)

i am nothing

HE is everything

potter and clay

made and lovingly created to be

a vessel

made for His glory, His grace and His love

grace and mercy molded together

He inhabits this clay vessel

Come! Lord Jesus Come!

Come! Holy Spirit Come!

"We can't love God's way without being filled with Him.
If we try it on our own, we end up exhausted and burnt out!"

quote from Heidi Baker, Reckless Devotion

The song of my heart

The Song of my Heart

Day upon day.
Today turns into yesterday
     and life moves on.
Dead buds are coming to life.
Snow piles melt ~
     leaving brown grass that delights with the warmth of the sun.
Ladybugs flit on window panes
     and flies awake and come out of hiding.

Furry blossoms are on the pussy willows
     taking me back to my childhood
     and yet years later still mystified at how furry these little buds are.
Simple things bring joy!
The pink of the morning sky
     and blazing orange of the sunset.
The cockiness of the big crow that flies down and grabs the biscuits I threw out for him
     and the beautiful blue apparel of the blue jays taking the peanuts at the feeder.

The season of winter has passed its baton to spring.
And spring ~ having teased us with above normal days 
     only to thrust us back into the throes of winter
     with brisk winds and snow. *sigh (where is that shovel?)

Having been quick to shed the remnants of winter,
     suddenly we throw our hands in the air 
          and promise that spring really is just around the corner
                 (as if we really have any say in the whole matter!)

Dusty sills and siding. (yes, that needs to be washed down)
Mud mixed in puddles of melted snow on the gravel driveway.   
     (calling out to the grandkids to see who can walk through it without losing a boot!)
Bird seed gathered and scattered on the deck from feeding during the winter
     ~ keeps "Chippy" running back and forth in delight
Chippy - the cute yet pesky little rodent!
"Alvin why do we have seeds squirrled away in the motor of our car?"
"Joy you have to stop feeding them on the deck!"
Poor Chippy doesn't realize there is a contract out on his life!  
     (its a good thing my sweet man isn't as quick at shooting Chippy 
     as Chippy is at running away and hiding!)

The sun warms up the house so much that the heat doesn't click on all day.
The windows are open and the freshness of spring comes in like a literal "breath of fresh air"
     moving the germs that have gathered over the winter
     when windows are tightly latched for fear of freezing open!!

Slush pants and rubber boots are the apparel of choice for the grandkids.
And I wear my crocs (the ones that my little grandson picked out for me for Christmas)
     and my toes welcome spring and the "no socks" time of year.
The new shoe scrubber at the front door has mud by it,
     having already cleaned a little shoe or two that went off the path and into the mud 
     (perhaps to quench an irresistible urge to see how deep the puddle was!)

Spring sings.
     My heart overflows!
Creation cries out
     with the rustle of bare grey branches, 
     shaking off dead leaves that have clung on with dear life all winter,
     in order to make way for shiny new leaves to come 
     in every hue of green imaginable.
The birds fly and call out 
     Jays sing and chickadees flit about
Creation is coming to life in a symphony of praise to the Creator.

And my heart sings
     with a fresh awakening
     coming out of a winter into glorious spring!
New life!
God you are so incredibly good.
Have I told you lately how much I love you!

If I had been Mary ... Resurrection Day thoughts

This morning, I sat by the window with my coffee cup, waiting for the sun to rise, hoping I would see it, but knowing that in itself would be perhaps not something I would see due to the overcast skies.
But I hoped.  I turned my Bible to John 20.  I have realized that is my favourite portion of Scripture for the Resurrection story.  HE IS RISEN!!

I couldn't help but put myself into the story, imagining Mary's thoughts, and Peter and John's thoughts, and imagining what the empty tomb or the angels or Jesus himself looked like ...
These are my thoughts!

Early Morning on the First Day of the Week

The sun rises on the other side of the clouds

a small glimmer of pink barely peeps through

I know that once again, 

somewhere it is shining in full glory for someone taking it in

I know - as creation does what God ordained it to do -

that whether I see it or not

the sun has risen

today, it holds special meaning

over and above my love for sunrises

it signifies "on the morning of the first day..."

Mary while it was still dark went to the tomb.

I can imagine her

walking, stepping along 

her feet not wanting to go to the tomb of the one whom she loved

Perhaps the sound of the birds pre-dawn chittering

overpowered the sound of her footsteps on the cobblestone path

her heart broken

her thoughts many

she arrives and stops, unable to comprehend the sight

the stone has been rolled away

in panic, she runs, not stopping to take a breath, 

until arriving where Peter and John are staying

and in between crying gasps she tells them

that they have taken Jesus body away!

O Mary, Peter and John

what did you think

were you awakened with news that only played on top

of your already shattered hearts?

Yet, you need to see for yourselves

in order to make sense of it all

and in no time at all you were out the door running

Peter in the lead until John, with an extra burst of speed, ran by and got to the tomb first.

O how you two loved Jesus

even though you were messy, broken and doubting

you loved him

with all your hearts

the Teacher

your greatest friend in all the world

He had transformed your lives in three short years

and now He is Gone!

you watched him breathe his last

be taken down

and as you cast glimpses over your shoulder, you led his mom away to your home

and began to try to put pieces together

Jesus, it made no sense.

And then this - 

to top it all off - as Mary has said

your body is

GONE

John peeks in through the opening

and Mary's words are true

Your body IS gone

they have truly taken away our LORD

then Peter, arriving slightly after John

gets closer

and goes into the empty tomb

his eyes accustoming to the dimness 

can it be?

they also took off his linen strips 

and his face covering

was also laying there, on its own

gently folded

and apart from the rest.

John, having regained his composure and thoughts

ventures into the tomb

and the emptiness of the tomb 

and sight of the folded linen shroud

cements the facts in his heat

that Jesus body has not been stolen

but somehow, not entirely understanding

he believes

that His Lord has risen!

the men turn and go back home

leaving their friend Mary with her thoughts

with the linen strips

and the empty tomb 

I can just imagine

Mary wept

no doubt with big tears that ran from her eyes, down her cheeks

and fell onto her dusty feet

and as if one more glimpse would help

she inches closer, stopover 

and gasps as she sees what appeared to be angels

at the head and feet of where her Lord's body had laid

and they speak to her

"woman, why are you crying?"

And as if its normal to have an early morning conversation with angels, 

she replies

"They've taken away my Lord and I don't know where they have laid him."

And she turns to leave

more distraught than when she first came

only to see yet one more person blocking her way

the gardener perhaps

but once again this man speaks to her

what is it about that voice?

"Woman why are you crying

Who are you looking for?"

perhaps this man, the gardener

held the key for this mystery.

Oh He held the key alright

not only to where Jesus was

but the keys to hell

having conquered death, hell and the grave

He stands there

and with that gentle voice that immediately draws her

He calls her by name

"Mary"

the rest is but a blur I can imagine

Mary recognizes the voice of the Teacher

the voice of the Shepherd

This is Jesus

 Realizing that she wants to hold him

and feel the beat of his heart

and his loving arms and strength

she runs over to him

But Jesus explains why she must not hold him yet

Then with overflowing joy in her heart

and a new found spring in her step

she runs to tell the disciples

I HAVE SEEN THE LORD

NOT a dead wrapped body

but one that was flesh and blood ALIVE

the real Jesus

HE is risen and I've seen Him!!

I can only imagine how her life changed that day

only imagine

and I know that I will see Him too

in all of His glory

my Saviour

and my Lord

I will behold Him!

The best is yet to come!

Hunger & Thirst

Hunger & Thirst

"I am the Living Bread"
Bread
"I am the Living Water"
Water

Hunger
Thirst
Eat
Drink
Be satisfied
Live.  Live eternally! Live

The road is long, rough and dusty
Sweat rolls down my cheeks and onto my neck
One foot in front of another
Step.  Step.  Step.

Lips parched
Mouth dry

Between hunger and thirst
My being is finding it hard to distinguish between the two
It just knows it's in need of sustenance

As the green trees are lush because of the water
So my being feels like it needs to be fed and watered
Not thrown a few crumbs... but fed real food
And to be able to drink from an overflowing well.

"I am" He says - Living Bread.
"I am Living Water!"
Whoever believes will never hunger or thirst again ~ EVER.

O LORD GOD, it seems so simple.
Why would I not choose to keep eating and drinking from you
And yet often ~ I revert to the crumbs of fast food and sips of other drink
that only temporarily feeds and quenches the empty hunger and thirst of my soul.

"I am the Living Bread.
Eat!"

"I am the Living Water.
Drink!"

"Believe.
Live."

Plodding along step by step
I realize that I often stop short and sell out to the quick and easy
because I get tired, or bored or just sell myself short.
Your Way O LORD isn't always easy
I know that, so why do I keep getting sidetracked
I am a seasoned traveller
Walking this route with you for the last 50 years
And yet, I still get taken by surprise.
You have carried me.
I've walekd hand in hand through mountains and valleys
You've fed me.
You've quenched my thirst.
You've given me the pull up when I've landed face down.

I know YOU are life
Yet like being on a diet, sometimes I treat you the same way -
and try other things while knowing nothing else fills, quenches or satisfies my soul

You are my bread.
you are my water
You are sweet to the taste
fully satisfying
fully quenching

Remind me Holy One
to keep eating
to keep drinking
from YOU!!

I love you Lord.
Joy
written in journal Jan. 8th, 2016
while in Huatulco, Mexico

time

I can hardly believe 

the number on the calendar

15

today is the fifteenth

where  oh where does time go

second upon second

minute upon minute

hour upon hour

days

weeks

months

I want to shout STOP

just 

STOP

and let me revel in this moment

at this time this day, this month, this year

but I know time ticks on

time was not created to stand still

but to be a marker of moments

hours, days, weeks, years

a marker of milestones

of family, friends, acquaintances

of appointments,

meetings

and coffee dates

in my life lately time has marked

advent walk through 

ministry retreaters

Christmas parties

and family birthdays

and everything that belongs to this wonderful season of Christmas

time ticks on

and I find myself attending my grandchildren 's Sunday school program

and my grandson's kindergarten concert

beaming

waving like a granny gone mad lol

and sitting misty-eyed

because I am remembering other times

of Christmas pageants and school concerts

and yet it feels like yesterday

when I got to the school an hour before in order to get a good seat

time

you measure moments

celebrations 

but also sorry and life changing events

we wait for time to pass

then lament where it has gone

It is a respecter of no one

although at times we hear that "time has been good to them"

time teaches us that we need to treasure the gift of today

without trying to rush to the surprise of tomorrow

time ticks

as hair turns grey 

and hands wrinkle

and steps get slower

and yet in one's mind "it seems like yesterday"

time

my best friend  - my not so best friend :)

you make me frazzled when overbooked

and yet at other times you make me quite content in the moment

fully aware

fully awake

fully alive

to the time around me - 

to sights, sounds, smells 

without you

I'd never know the grace that comes with age

the wrinkles that come with laughter

and the wisdom that comes with living life

without you

id never move out of my cozy house

or comfy pew

or complacent job

or walk in adventures with my husband, my kids and my grandkids

without time

i would never see my grandkids grow

and run and talk

i would never see the beauty that God brings our of ashes

I would never see the forgiveness that happens after its worked through

I would never see the heart heal after broken into a million pieces

I would never venture out in boldness 

and Id never learn to count my blessings

time you are my friend and sometimes you feel like my foe !!

you felt like you were never ending when I was a child

carefree and living a simple and good life

but now as and adult you cause me to reflect backward and sometimes i feel old

time

you have reached through the good times

but felt like you stood still during the sorry

and yet time

you've grown me

you've defined moments in my life

you have sealed occasions in my memory

and have made me realize in retrospect

the great life God has given me

through my 57years of time

time

you measure my life

but you are a gift from God

and I am so thankful

- Joy

December 15, 2015

"time has a wonderful way

to show us what really matters"

- Margaret Peters

breath of God

Based on my quiet time with God this morning, as I was lead to read Ezekiel 37 which is about the valley of dry bones.  These are my thoughts.

carried away by the Spirit

he was taken in a matter of no time at all

to a valley

not just any valley

but one of desolation and eat

bones were everywhere

dry

dry 

bones

too many to count 

and while standing eyes wide open 

in wonder and astonishment

he head the voice of God

clearly 

God was right there 

and asked him a very interesting question based on the sight before his eyes

"Son of Man can these bones become living people again?"

everything within in felt like that was impossible

yet, just being there, carried by the Spirit of the LORD 

he knew he was going to see something amazing

he had that feeling

"O Sovereign LORD" he answered 

"You alone know the answer to that."

and then he heard the Sovereign LORD during him to speak a prophetic word

from the lips of this visionary prophet

not just any words, but words that came straight from the mouth of God, to his

"Dry bones listen to the Word of the LORD.  

This is what the Sovereign LORD says, Look I am going to put breath into you

and make you live again.

I will put flesh and muscles on you and cover you with skin.

I will put breath into you and you will come to life.

then you will know that I am the LORD."

the prophet stood there briefly

digesting the words given him to speak

breath

life

wow!

And then he spoke clearly and boldly to the dry bones

and before his eyes

the valley resounded with the rattling of not just one

but thousands of bones

shaking

moving

rattling

what a noise

what a sight

even though scattered

each bone knew where to attach with the other

making up complete skeletons

And before his eyes

muscles and ligaments attached 

and then skin ~ 

full complete bodies

but while complete

they had no breath

But the sovereign LORD told the prophet to speak prophetic words again

calling to the valley

and specifically calling to the bones

"O breath from the four winds

breath into these dead bodies

so they may live again."

and there before the prophet's eyes

that all came to life

before his eyes - they stood

the sight of a mighty army totally taking his breath away

prophetic word revealed

spoken

and come to be

the prophet was brought to his knees by it all

and by the realization of the sovereignty of the LORD GOD that he served

"But what does this mean O Sovereign LORD?" 

and the  LORD GOD explained it all message of new life

to a people ini bondage

in exile

and without hope

dry bones

breath of God

new life!

And as I read about the prophet's encounter

I knew it was for me today

my dry bones can come to life

because of the breath of the holy spirit within me

And so I breathe deeply ~ 

waiting for him to fill my being

Today

I choose life!

Peanuts BlueJays and Woodpeckers

This picture does not do him justice at all!!

The sun is shining
The air is crisp
And the porch beneath my barefoot is cold reminding me that it's December
I dump the container full of peanuts into the bird feeder
and having stripped the wrap off of the seed block, I place it quickly on the prong
Knowing that within minutes my family of feathered friends will be there

I take my seat in the comfort of my home
Fresh cup of coffee in hand - I watch
and there they are in all their beauty.
a living reflection of the Creator
the jays beauty reflected by the shades of blue and sometimes raucous behaviour
the magpie who has found the bird feeder to be an easy snack
huge and powerful he flies in barely stopping to grab a peanut in its shell
he flies in, chasing all the others away merely with his intimidating presence
(and I thought the Blue Jays were big)
the nuthatch who loves to hang upside down and peck away at the block of seeds
and the woodpeckers with their red marked heads and speckled bodies arrive in all sizes.

God's array of beauty
in feathers, beaks and calls
Ive heard the Jay as he sits on the feeder looking towards the window and calling a specific call
which whether its his intent or not ~ when I hear it I know the peanuts are all gone
(the woman at Birds Unlimited did warn me about rationing the peanuts with the Jays!)

And then last but not least the cute little chickadees who (as my grandkids say) sing "chicka dee dee dee) when they are around

I watch them on this quiet sunny morning
and I realize that God's giving me many teachable moments through my feathered friends
If I believe the Bible is true - which I do
I believe what it says when Jesus uses the examples of the birds of the air
they are not worried about their lives because He cares for them SO how much more does he care for me!
Sometimes I forget that
and live my life as if I am in control
as if I have to make all the decisions alone
in my physical life I know i live recklessly and willfully rebellious often
Even though the Holy Spirit within me makes me aware of His presence and nudging
Oh how often I must quench the Spirit
Lord forgive me.

As I watch the birds eating for their sustenance and fuel
i realize the times i eat because I feel empty but its often not because of physical and real hunger
He has remained me today that He cares about ti all
each breath
each drink
each morsel of food
And has told me that He alone can fill that void
that I try filling with sweet things other than Him

I know that all the sweets in the world (or in my cupboard)
can't fill me up
He is the Living Bread
He is the Living Water
HE IS

I sat and watch the Blue Jays as they shake the peanuts to see perhaps if the shell contains one peanut or two
They pick up and drop and pick another
and sometimes shake it far back into their fullest and pick up one more peanut
Often they come to the feeder one after another like I have watched the planes at Chicago airport come in one, then another and another
This is God's Blue jay runway outside my window.

Oh and I just realize all the peanuts are gone
And i decide to and dump another container fools that I can continue to enjoy the teachable moments
of this hour
of this day
of my life

And then - like the kisses that God often places into my life as a reminder that HE is GOD and HE is HERE ... he sends the biggest woodpecker ever at the feeder.
The beautiful pileated woodpecker,


This is the Scripture the LORD led me to today:

Matthew 6:24-34New Living Translation (NLT)

24 “No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.

25 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? 27 Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

28 “And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, 29 yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. 30 And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

31 “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God[a] above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

³⁴ “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

Grateful!  May You also enjoy some teachable moments throughout your day!
blessings

joy