Yesterday

Yesterday
All my troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks as though they're here to stay
Oh I believe in yesterday...

Those are the words to part of a song from the Beatles - not sure why they came to mind - perhaps since I wrote the word YESTERDAY at the top of my blog!

Anyhow - back to YESTERDAY (and not the song!) Although I do love the beatles. Sorry - sometimes it feels like my thoughts are going a million miles an hour - and they are all over. It is like I am talking and listening and then out of the blue - I am distracted! Just temporarily though!! My kids have laughed about this, but I know that I need to work at keeping focused!! Sometimes I feel like I am working with some ADHD behaviour that I recognize in myself. Personally, I think the scatteredness is still a part of the grief.

So, back to yesterday!
I had to drop off Alvin to meet the guys and go to their BLUE JAY FAMILY WORKS job - and then I headed to curves at 7 am. Since I was done and showered by 8 I spent the next hour at my FAVORITE hang-out - you guessed it, MOUNTAIN BEAN. I took in my Bible, my journal, and some bible study work - still working through the study by Beth Moore on ESTHER.

It is amazing what can be done over a good cup of coffee. Yesterday I treated myself and had cream in it. Ummmm.

I want to share the verses that have become dear to me - with no commentary.
Read them and see if they bless your heart the same way!

Psalm 119: 37
"Turn my eyes from worthless things and give me life through your Word."

Psalm 119: 92 & 93
"If your instruction hadn't sustained me with joy - I would ahve died in my misery. I will ever forget your commandment for by them you give me life!"

Isaiah 26:8
"Lord we show our trust in you by obeying your laws. Our hearts desire is to glorify your name."

Now, I want to share something else from the book - A CALL TO DIE: 40 days of fasting from the world and feasting on the Word.

What does it look like for the Spirit to be alive in me?
think of the acryonym MAP
M- the Spirit's work is a MYSTERY!
A- our life becomes an ADVENTURE!
P- seeing Him at work deepens our PASSION for Him!


And last but not least - today I was studying Esther chapter 4 with Beth Moore.
I love the way that woman teaches and just brings the Word of God to Life!
Today she was talking about how Esther had a CHOICE. (to go to the King and plead for her people) at the risk of being put to death. Esther FACED THE FEAR!
Did you know that the most important frequent command in the Bible is DO NOT BE AFRAID! (I need to remember that!) and Esther faced her fear and TOOK THE COURAGE she was offered. If you don't know the story - then go to the Word of God and read the book of Esther. (which by the way, is my second name)

One thing Beth said was "you may be one brave decision away from the most important turn in your entire path!"

I have been thinking about that - about fear that keeps me paralyzed at times.
About courage - and how sometimes I feel like such a chicken heart!
About making decisions to follow - when I can't see. I realize this chapter in my life right now - I am truly walking by faith. Yep - a little afraid I guess.

God - please help me to make the right choice - to follow you - to listen to you say DO NOT BE AFRAID and blieve you enough to follow you out on the water!

Those are my thoughts for today - this rainy day - but sunny in my heart. I know that HE IS FAITHFUL -- even though I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death... HE IS FAITHFUL - I just need to hear him say, "Take Courage, It is I, do not be afraid!" O Lord, find me bold, find me courageous, find me willing to follow you - to LIVE, LIVE, LIVE - all out, fully, for you dear Lord. Amen.