Wednesday, May 8

An offer to you re: Spiritual Direction

Thankful for my journey in and down ... 

A journey of learning to stand, and valuing the rootedness I have, and allowing my roots to tap into the source living water as the Holy Spirit fills and moves within me, and through me.

This journey has been slow.  One step at a time, and a a lot  of sitting, thinking, listening,  journalling and spending time with the ONE who gives me breath!  Where would I be without God in my life, and the power of the Holy Spirit.  There is no right or wrong to this journey, and there is no end this side of Heaven.  However I see how I have grown and learned so much about who I am, who I have been created to be at the very essence of my being.  Words do not come easy to describe this journey.  In fact, I don't think I would do it any justice even if I tried.  But I know what I have learned and grown in, and I am so thankful.

Years and years ago (in the mid 80's) a friend of mine encouraged me to begin taking "spiritual retreats" at St. Benedicts Retreat and Conference Centre (which is no longer operating) just north of the city of Winnipeg, on Main Street.  I remember those retreats with such fondness as I began to experience the stirrings within my soul ~ calling me to go deeper.  Shortly after, in the late 80's, I began to see someone from our church, for Spiritual Direction.  At the time this idea was new to me, and I would say new to most people.  After the early 2000's, I still met with my Spiritual Director.  

Life carried on, and I was heavily involved in ministry.  I had gone through New Way Ministry under Dr. Larry Crabb.  My goodness, I loved learning under that man of God!  Those intensive weeks were such formative times for me, and the work within my soul.  God does that - uses people to lead us and help us to press in.  I got my certificate as a Spiritual Director and just kept thinking that it was going to help me be a better listener while I following the LORD in retreat ministry - the call that we received very clearly on our lives. 

In 2021 I decided it was time to meet again with a Spiritual Director, and that is where Cathy AJ Hardy came into my life.  I knew Cathy as she had led the two Silent Retreats for Women at The Mark Centre in Abbotsford, BC.  As well I had the joy of hosting Cathy for a night of music.  About 20 people met to listen to her sing and play, and tell story.   Reaching out to Cathy seemed like a good idea to me and so I reached out and asked her if she had room to take me on.  And she did.  




Meeting with Cathy coincided with me also entering into the Soul Care program that Cathy has developed and offers.  So for the two years of Spiritual Direction, I also was under her leadership.  And then I made an even bigger decision, and that was to apply to the Soul Care Spiritual Direction Training.

I was accepted and we began the two years of study last October.  At that time, I did change to another Spiritual Director who I am really appreciating getting to know.  


Me with my Spiritual Director, Judith 

Where am I going with this?  I am so thankful for all that I have learned, and grown in, and for what God has done in an through me.  In Cathy's book WALK WITH ME, she says "I believe that Spiritual Direction It's about walking each other home to the truth, beauty and essence of our souls.  I believe there's a mystery that we touch in Spiritual Direction that is eternal and beautiful.  Some would say this is the beauty of the soul.  Some would say that we are touching the Presence of God.  Some would say that it's the union of the two."

I am sharing this with you at this point as a number of you have asked me about my journey first with a spiritual director and also now as I am in school.  At this point in our schooling, we are looking forward (with shaky knees I might add) to beginning our practicum as Spiritual Directors.  We are looking for people who may consider an amazing opportunity to have a spiritual director for 6 - 1 hour zoom sessions - FREE OF CHARGE. Yep, no charge to you, except a commitment to show up for your zoom sessions, prepared to have someone journey with you.  Our teachers/leaders will be taking all the names that come in, and just to be clear, friends will not be paired with their friends.  There is a good reason behind this.  

IF YOU ARE INTERESTED - please email me at womenrefreshed@gmail.com or message me on facebook and I will send you the letter and the intake form.  Again - this is for 6 months free spiritual direction.  You won't regret it.

I am also attaching the link for the Soul Care program, https://soulcare.ca should you wish to look for yourself.    

If you want to talk more about it - let me know - we can talk over a cup of coffee either in person or by FaceTime or phone.  

Think and Pray about it,  and please don't wait too long to let me know :)

j


Enjoy this beautiful song by Cathy called COME TO THE TABLE

Sunday, May 5

The morning of the day my Mum went home to be with Jesus (1996)





(Grade 6)


(20 years of age, 1978)


This is how I love remembering my mum <3



Today marks 28 years.  And this morning I will once again take out roses to the cemetery, and spend some time thinking about the mother she was to us.  28 years is a good chunk of my life.  I was just a month shy of turning 38 when my mum went to be with Jesus.   Its funny - I used to call her mOm but she always signed her name love MUM.  So it always seems fitting that when I remember her now, I smile as I write Mum.

It has been an interesting thing these past couple years as I have been doing much interior work, or soul care.  I have been thinking a lot of growing up, and my relationships.  And I realize that with my mum, my greatest times were after I graduated, and then when I was working and would come home for lunches, and then when I married and had the children.  I spent a lot more time with my mum during my years from 18-38 and especially from 20 onward once I got married.  I think it was the way that I had a different focus, and somehow just wanted to be with my mum more.  How I wish I had asked her more questions.  How I wish I had asked her about her life and written down story.  How I wish I asked her about the pain that made her sleep most nights in the living room lazy boy chair.  How I wish I asked her the things that would now help me understand myself during this last third of my life.  

My Mum.  I can honestly say that I never heard her ever gossip.  (My brother Tim is much like mum in this way and I have learned so much from him).  She never put down anyone.  She was gentle even with my dad who sometimes often pushed the envelope.  She was organized (man I wish I got that from her).  Mum was a woman who was always behind the scenes doing the lion's share of the work often.  When I think of the years that she ordered the food for Faith Bible Camp.  She was still doing this in the early 80's which means at that point it was almost 30 years.   But She. Never. Complained.   Even with the pain that I know she lived with.  (I need to complain less I guess)

My Mum loved Jesus.  I would often find her quietly in prayer, or doing her Bible reading.  She was consistent in her faith.  Not flamboyant or charismatic, but consistent.  

I had so much that I was just getting to experience with my Mum, and then she got called home to heaven.  She was only just 74.  But her body was weary from some late onset effects of the diabetes.  And her heart was affected too.  

The night before mum went to heaven, Tim and I stayed the night.  In the morning Tim went down to find some coffee for us, which meant that I had time to talk to Mum.  She had not talked to us since Wednesday.  The doctor had told us she would likely have a week, and Sunday, that morning, was a week.  I went beside my mum, and took her hand.  Alvin always said to us - "Keep talking to your mom because she can still hear you even if she is not responding to you."  So I talked to her.  I told her how much I loved her and how much we were so thankful for how she raised us, and how she loved us.  And then I told her that she could go, we would be okay.  We would miss her so much, but she had given so much to us, that we would be okay.   And all of a sudden two tears came.  I could hardly believe my eyes, but I knew that Mum heard me.

We watched Mum breathe her last breaths shortly after 1, and without any effort at all, she passed from this world, into the presence of Jesus who she loved and served.

I remember that like it was yesterday.  But today marks 28 years.

So, I will head to the cemetery.  I most often go alone.  Last year I went and took roses with my little brother Tim.  That will be a beautiful memory.  I actually kind of like going alone, as I can just be there as long or as little as I want.  I can listen to the waves of the lake lapping.  I can feel the sunshine on my face.  I can listen to the birds.  I can talk out loud (ya, I do when I am there).  I KNOW I am going to the cemetery for ME, only my Mum's remains are there - but for me, it is a small trek, and a time to remember.  I always take roses because I used to always buy roses for her when she was alive - for sure monthly, sometimes more.   

So today I will head out to the Balsam Bay cemetery - and chances are, the birds will hear me thanking God once again for my mom and dad and the legacy they left!