Thursday, April 3

Realizing that tears are (for me) part of intercession

Tonight, I have signed up for an after midnight shift for SOAR HEARTLAND that is happening as I write and will be wrapping up this weekend.  Our church has a big group of kids and leaders involved, and it is a privilege to be able to pray on their behalf over this week.

My heart is full of things that I have been praying for. Of course my prayers focus around my kids, and my grandkids, and yes, for Alvin and I as individuals, couple, parents, and grandparents - we need lots of prayer.  When my kids were little, the last thing that we did before they ran down the road to the waiting school bus, was to pray.  We have prayed in the car, in restaurants, in parking lots as we have said good-bye.  In airports, in our home, in their homes - around the table - at the front door - with one, with all of them - over them, over their kids.  I have prayed with them, for them, out loud, in silence - and often with tears.  Tears (I have come to see) are part and parcel of interceding for someone.

I have had the privilege to pray via email, and via Facebook chat, and via the phone, and via Skype.  You see, I don't think it matters to God how we pray.  Standing.  Sitting.  Driving.  Eyes wide open.  Eyes shut.  Kneeling.  Lying face down before Him.  Walking.  Phone.  Email.  Is there ever a right or a wrong way to come before God?

I have also been a part of a huge prayer chain.  In fact - the other day we were talking about the prayer chain, and our friend, who I call the "hub" of the prayer chain (he is the one that gets sent prayer requests and then sends them out literally around the world).  He was saying that he thinks the prayer chain actually had its beginning when we had called him in our brokenness over the silent birth of our little Jay.  Oh we were so carried by the prayers of God's people during that time - and often since.

I am not sleeping so well these days - not sure - maybe I really do have to switch to decaf coffee after all OR just stop drinking coffee after 8!! Anyhow, I often wake up and pray … allowing God to bring to mind the one that I need to intercede for at that time. And my heart is so full.  So very very full.
Life is hard isn't it.  It is hard with God - I just can't fathom life without Him.

Lately I have wept often as I have prayed.  Tears flow easily.  And I have just come to realize that I believe it goes with interceding - with bringing some one's needs to the throne room of God!  I also know that at times, I can hardly speak … and I am so thankful that the Word of God says that the Holy Spirit intercedes for us, with groaning when we can't pray.  I am also so glad that I do not have to go to another human being to confess, or to pray - as I can go straight to the Lord - He has made that possible.

My prayers these days have been for healing - petitioning for physical healing/miracles.  I know God is God, and He has a plan and a purpose, but I also know that He says to pray boldly, so I am.
I want to pray boldly.  I am still trying to understand how that works.  Do we sometimes wimp out when we pray by saying Lord I pray for healing, or Lord, I pray for this … and then almost as an afterthought tack on "if its your will".  Don't get me wrong - I believe wholeheartedly that we need to pray for God's will.  But sometimes I think we use it, almost like we have to "give" God and out so to speak.The other day in my morning QT I read from John 14 where Jesus said "And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father.  You may ask me for anything in my name and I will do it."    I am trying to figure this out in my own heart …. and in the meantime, I know from past experience - that God is God.  God is also good.  Sometimes we don't feel like He is hearing us - but He is still good.  So, I will (in the meantime) keep petitioning God - on behalf of those I know and love - those I love even though I don't know them - the young, the old - friends, acquaintances - you name it - I believe if God lays people on my heart - He is calling me to come boldly into his throne room with the prayers on their behalf.  I will keep petitioning God.  I will keep listening.  I will keep praying when I wake up at night, and when drive, and do my dishes, and walk on my treadmill.  And … along with the prayers … I will also continue to weep.

Lord, you say that you will do it, so that the Father is glorified.  So Lord, about little Ben, please heal him Jesus - I pray in your name - please heal him - cause a miracle - cause the tumour to shrink!  O Jesus - please, I am asking you.  I am also asking you for my friends marriage - and for my friends going through depression.  Lord, I am bringing before you - all the youth involved in Soar Heartland, and also for the leaders.  For all the decisions made this week - and the growth that has happened in the lives and hearts of each one - Lord, continue to draw them closer to you Jesus.  I also bring before you my friends husband. Lord please bring him to his knees, as it is only in that, that he will be able to look up and see his need for you Lord.  I pray for recovery of health for my friend, but that you would also continue to grow and nurture all that has happened in her being during this time of fatigue, and ill health.  Lord, you have shown yourself strong and mighty in her life.  I pray for my friend waiting to hear about her immigration status.  I pray for my grandkids to grow strong and healthy and happy but most of all for each of them to turn their hearts to you Jesus, once they are old enough to understand and make that decision.  I pray for my friend who is in the weeks following chemo and radiation - that you would be her strength and healer.  I pray for my friend who has lost a Father/Grandfather figure, and the pain that came with that.  I pray for my friend recovering from surgery.  I pray for safety for my men as they work on the jobs you have called them too.  I pray for the end to an affair that is causing destruction for my friend - Lord, bring that affair to an end - I pray O God - bring healing to that marriage. Give my friend strength as she stands in the gap for her marriage.  May she see her husband turn to you Jesus!!  I pray for our youth pastor who is going to be speaking to a great number of kids tomorrow.  I pray for my new friend who is struggling with so many autoimmune diseases that are playing havoc with her body.  I pray for women I know who are struggling with feeling unloved and not valued.  May each one feel how greatly you love them, and call them beautiful in your eyes.  Lord -  There is just so much … O God - bring comfort to my new friends who have lost their first Granddaughter, born beautiful but silently.  And for my friend who lost their son last summer, and today remember his birthday.  I also pray for my friends who are struggling with decisions that their children are making.  O Lord, God - there is just so very much in our lives - but I know God that you are bigger, stronger, and able to do miracles in each one of these lives!  You O God - you are the great I AM.  You are Healer - Deliverer - Refuge, Rock, Redeemer.  You O God - are righteous and just.  You are the great physician.  You also give wisdom to our physicians.  You Lord God are ALMIGHTY … Saviour - King.  You are GOD.  O Lord - hear my prayers.  May my tears be an offering to you - and may you be honoured and praised.  May each answer bring honour and glory to the Father!  I pray this in your most holy and precious name - Jesus.  I love you.  Amen.  At the name of Jesus …  whatever we ask in your name.  Jesus.