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| Feels like Home to me ... |
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| The view from my deck - looking onto the labyrinth. |
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As I walked, I talked with the LORD about life, and He talked with me about what I needed to lay down |
My time in Abbotsford was unscheduled except for our Anam Cara Gathering with Cathy J. Hardy who also became a friend years ago. The gathering would take place in Mission on Saturday afternoon to evening. Otherwise, my time was free to do as I pleased. My time here was a gift in so many ways.
So between Thursday night and Sunday noon - I walked the labyrinth at the Mark Centre, I read, I journaled, went on drives, sang, and spent alot of time with God.
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| the most amazing little cafe that was suggested by The Mark Centre |
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| the Chai Latte was the best I have ever tasted |
I made an impromptu trip to see my niece in Chilliwak, and I also followed a suggestion in the Mark Centre's info book, to go and check out a little place called SippChai Cafe - which I did. In fact I went there several times :) (OKAY 4 times to be exact)
I also walked. And it was my Friday walk in particular - that I was brought back to October of 2008 when Alvin and I walked the same route. That January (2002) I had sat in Thailand with our missionary friend Louise Sinclair Peters - we were having coffee before the bus took us away. I was sharing with her that although I was pastoring - I knew without a doubt that God was turning up the heat on the retreat vision. She encouraged Alvin and I to connect with Steve & Evy Klassen in Abbotsford. To hear that they had opened a retreat ministry warmed my heart and I stored the info away.
This was going to be our year of adventure - I knew that - our 50th birthdays, 30th anniversary, our daughter's engagement and then a wedding. But right smack in the middle of the year was our first grand baby's birth! So there was so much on our hearts, on top of our normal daytime jobs of firefighting and pastoring.
And then our lives as we knew them stopped shortly after noon on July 24th, and our new lives began.The brokenness we experienced was indescribable. We were a mess to put it mildly. A. Real. Mess. Although in the midst of the mess, we knew that our God was sitting there with us. I can see that picture in my mind - God sitting on the floor with His arms around us, in the midst of a million broken pieces of our hearts strewn all around us. Sitting - holding - and catching our tears in bottles. (Have you ever wondered about this verse? Why would he want to keep our tears? Perhaps the most beautiful bodies of water in heaven are full because of all the tears, now there's a thought!)
So it was that fall in 2008 - towards the last week in October, that Alvin and I were told there was a last minute opening in the bookings at the Mark Centre. We booked a flight and came to Abbotsford. We needed the rest. The change of scenery, and we also needed to spend some time with Steve and Evy. We asked if that could be a possibility - and they obliged - and we made an appointment to meet with them in the upperroom at TMC. I often wonder if we looked as bad as we felt. I think we can mask up pretty easily. We wondered what we would talk about - what was the most pertinent thing - if we just had an hour. Well, in the end, the hour turned to two, and we were able to hear how the Mark Centre came to be, and we were able to share what God had called us to. It is quite something to find people that you share a common ground with. Different but similar. We were so thankful for this time, and I am not sure that Steve and Evy realized how pivotal that visit was that day.
About 4 years later Steve came to the city for a couple things, and was able to come out to our place - we were still finishing up inside the house - but there we sat at a table, with Subway that I had picked up for lunch, and we had some good conversation. It was short and sweet but I remember that it felt like we connected - like siblings in a way - their ministry with ours. I think it was from then on I began to call The Mark Centre - our "big brother in ministry".
Since then I have had the joy to spend three more visits there, and have also had times of encouragement from Steve via email or phone text. We have also hosted Steve here and he did a day retreat called "Listening to God" and as well we hosted Steve and Evy, their son, and dear friend Cathy Hardy for supper and Cathy put on a concert!
Steve has also been able to speak with our board chair, who was also able to connect with TMC board when our board were making some decisions and loved to hear some input. Usually when I come to Abbotsford, a visit at Starbucks with Steve is just part of the visit. I love how God does that - He connects people in ministry - and places - and similarity in call/vision.
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| God spoke as I retraced same steps I had walked with Alvin in fall of 2008 and again God spoke into the depths of my heart |
So this time as I walked the walk that Alvin and I had taken together in October of 2008, I realized that some things felt the same - but so much had changed. At the time we met Steve and Evy for the first time, our kids had just come home from a little time away and heard God speak about retreat ministry - and building a combined space. So when we talked with S and E - we knew that we would be looking for land, which we bought about five months after. Our ministry at The Well just celebrated its 9th birthday. Where does time go?
As I walked I realized that God brought us there in 2008, the same way he brought me back there three more times. Brought back for a time of rest, renewal, retreat and giving the space for my ears to hear Him speak. No wonder if "feels like home" when I drive into the lane. In some ways, it has been home - to newness of life each and every time. And to relationships between people we call "friend" and a ministry we affectionately call our "big brother."
I walked and realized that I looked different than I did then - going on 14 years in fall ... besides the obvious grey hair! I believe that the journey of grief has left some lines, but so have the incredible moments of joy. I realize I have changed over the past years and have experienced the really tough part of ministry (that people don't always talk about) as well as the blessings in the midst. I realize God has changed me from being a "Mary" to the stark realization of how much a "Martha" was needed in this ministry. But it was in 2018 at "Come Away" at TMC that I wrote the words from Him telling me "I am bringing you back to being a Mary" although if I am honest, I was not sure how He would do that in the midst of ministry were I am busy cooking and cleaing (is that not Martha stuff?). I don't believe he brought me back to being a Mary until COVID hit and then I saw his words become reality.
I assume that every time in the future (Lord Willing) that I am able to head back west to the Mark Centre - I will go eagerly to retreat. I know every time I will look different, as age plays into that. I look forward to whenever that time happens again, but in the meantime, I will hold the time with great fondness, like a treasure of great price held in my hands, knowing that God has spoke to me/us and will continue to speak there (yes, as He does here). My ears DO hear ... as I am able to step out of the traffic, to be still and know that HE IS GOD!! To breathe deeply - and just be.
My time here in this beautiful place blooming with Spring - ministered deeply into the heart of this winter weary prairie girl!
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| Cathy & I |
Cathy J. Hardy - I thank God he brought you into my life, and the women in our Anam Cara Circle. Thank you for walking with me - for speaking - for singing - for encouraging me - and speaking into the growth God is doing in me. (Hope you can see yourself at the end of the table in the computer screen!!)
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| a table set for supper together Amazing food - good conversation and LOVE in the midst |
Theresa Hiebert - thank you for making sure my room was ready and even if you were not able to come to the gathering at Cathy's - so glad you were there by zoom!! Love you my friend. I think we are behind in some "Holy Listening" time!!
And Steve Klassen thank you for listening to the promtings of God, and for the way you and Evy spoke into our lives back in 2008, and blessed us as you encouraged us along our journey of beginning at The Well ... next time - Starbucks on Mt. Lehman - and I will buy :)
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| on my way to Mission such beauty to behold |
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| till next time ... |
