Saturday, February 18

lesson learned in the ER

I believe that we can use our experiences to learn from, and that is what happened as I laid in a bed in the emergency area of Concordia Hospital very early Friday morning.  First of all, I realize that I actually drove myself to emergency.  I asked God out loud, "please Lord, help me to get there."  Everything was painful - but especially trying to take a breath!  I just couldn't.  And I couldn't get a good position - not sitting, not walking, not laying.  Pain and shortness of breath.  Those words alone will get you into emerg very quickly.

It was on my right side.  The same rib that I noticed was sore a couple days before.  I had gone to sleep with the electric heating pad on my sore rib area.  I went to bed early, only to wake up shortly after 1 am unable to take a breath, and unable to find a good sleeping position.  Being home alone meant that I needed to drive myself in, and so I did.

Anyhow I got there - and they took me in when they saw I could not breath.  Even though I said it was not my heart, and not radiating any where else - they still hooked me up with the sticky things and did an EKG.  Took blood work.  Put an IV in.  The nurse, Heather, was such a sweetie.  Very efficient and friendly too!  The Doctor checked me over and ordered a muscle relaxant after he was convinced that it was nothing else - and perhaps WAS the fibromyalgia.  The oxygen in my nose helped me breathe.  And soon, the pain went from a 9-10 to a 6.   It felt so much better.  The ER was full of people there for various reasons:  a guy with abdominal pain - most likely gall bladder.  A young woman with abdominal pain.  Another middle aged woman who had some bouts of confusion during the course of the night, while out with friends.  A woman with abdominal pain, most likely flu related.  And then in came an older woman - early 90's.  She came in by ambulance.  Here is where my "lesson" came into place.  I saw them bring her in, and could not help but hear the conversation.  She woke up with a little anxiety.  Perhaps had a bit of erratic heart palpitations.  She did have a pacemaker put in within last year.  But just had a check up and all was well.  Called the ambulance because she was anxious.  Maybe she got more anxious just thinking about it.  (hmmm.... is that what happened with me too?  somehow there is this feeling of security when you are in a hospital.)

Her kids came - son and daughter-in-law and chatted with her abit (this was about 3 am) and then they left when they were told that all seemed to be fine - but they would keep her there till the morning.

My lesson ...  I want to be around for a long time yet.  I no longer have parents to take care of - to visit - to worry about.  That often makes me sad.  However, as I see friends who are taking care of parents, some of whom have Alzheimer's, I am thankful that my parents did remain clear till the end.
But what will my end be?  I don't know that.  I do know that Alvin and I pledged "in sickness and in health - till death do us part" in our vows.  But as I laid there - mostly awake (cat napped a couple times but was so worried about snoring!).  I realized that I do not want to be a worry to my kids.  I do not want to be in and out of hospital.  All of a sudden I realized how important it REALLY is to get my health to be the best I can.  Or like my reminder on my phone says:  REMEMBER WHY.
Remember why??  For my grand kids.  For my kids.  I want to be healthy enough to sit on the floor to play AND to be able to get up from there!  I want to be able to walk - to push strollers - to pull wagons - to climb at the playground.  I would even love to be able to dance at my grand kids weddings DV
(Lord willing).

I think the trip to the ER was my "lesson" about taking each day - and making good choices in what I do/eat/make choices about.  Yes, I am going to be 54 this June - but I still have alot of life ahead of me!!

Funny how it took a hospital blue gown, an IV and a little old lady to drive that one home.
Which is what I did at 6 - I drove home - feeling much better - being able to breath - but also very aware of what I learned at 3 am on a Friday morning.  May the Lord help me to apply it to my life and live FULLY for Him as a result.

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