Monday, February 15

good conversations and cups of coffee

these photos were all taken from our surprise Valentine's date, which was planned by our husbands under the leadership of Kevin Hampton (who unfortunately I only have him in the background on one picture) and was at Kim and Kevin's house - we had a gourmet meal cooked and served by Chef Rob, wine, roses, coffee, great music, amazing food, some chocolate, hot tubbing, and a whole lot of great conversation! We were so surprised and delighted! Our men are romantics!

coffee + friends = wonderful conversations from the heart

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oh coffee ! Sometimes I wonder what life would be like without the mug of fresh, strong black coffee!!

Over several cups of coffee this past week - I have enjoyed several conversations! Going back to last week - I have enjoyed some good coffee with my kids (oh man, I love my kids); I actually got in a cup of coffee while over for a snuggle & cuddle visit with my little grandson too; enjoyed an extra large Tim Horton's coffee with Meggie; I had an extra large Tim Horton's with Mary; a cup of coffee with Ann at her apartment after a great supper out together; several cups of coffee with Frank and Karis when they were out for supper Thursday; coffee with Brenda over lunch at Grace Cafe; several cups of coffee with John and Ruth when they were out for supper Friday; coffee with Kev, Kim, Lloyd, Judy, Betty, Willy, Alvin and I over our Saturday night surprise Valentine's; a cup of coffee during a presentation in the Adult SS class yesterday; a cup of coffee at my neice Sarah's birthday party with our Klassen side of the fam; and a couple cups of coffee here last night with Willy and Betty. Tomorrow I will begin the day with coffee at Mountain Bean with Amber, and well, in between, Alvin and I have enjoyed a few pots of fresh coffee.

"I do not wish to treat friendships daintily, but with the roughest courage. When they are real, they are not glass
threads or frost-work, but the solidest thing we know."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thing is, while I just simply ENJOY coffee - the truth of the matter is - so many wonderful conversations happen over cups of coffee or tea or whatever (some of my friends drink hot water). Coffee and Conversations just simply "go together".

This past week we have talked with others about things that really "matter" at a heart level. I have come to realize that not everyone in my life wants to go deep like that. There has to be a trUst level. I have come to understand that not everyone really really wants to hear what you say. For some, it is a matter of feeling uncomfortable with the truth, or feeling uncomfortable with honest words. For some it is a matter of being afraid of not knowing what to do with the conversation or authenticity. Why is it that so many people feel that they always have to SAY something. Honestly, there are times when keeping your mouth shut, and just hugging the person, is the best response. I have come to understand that body language is HUGE when someone is sharing with you.... as well, it is huge when you are the one sharing and observing the other who is listening. I have come to understand that you have to pick and choose who you want to be open and honest with. Not everyone cares. And not everyone actually "hears" what you are saying. That has been a big eye opener for me. For some - it is easier "not to go there" as they won't have to be uncomfortable. No ones actually LIKES being uncomfortable - but life just isn't always easy is it?

"Friendship that flows from the heart cannot be frozen by adversity, as the
water that flows from the spring cannot congeal in winter." - James Fenimore Cooper

This past week - we have talked about family... about our grandson Everett...about church.
We have heard hearts break over family relationships... and hope for restoration of family. I have heard about considerable loss in the people around me...from jobs to relationships. I have had conversation that included much laughter interspersed with serious discussion. We have talked about what "church" looks like now compared to what Jesus wanted the "church" to look like. We have agreed that we don't think Jesus likes what "church" has been made into...especially the church politics that mEss up things. We talked about topics such as "emerging church" and "forgiveness"... we have talked & talked & talked some more. In some cases - talking for hours, with coffee cups in our hand. Perhaps I drink too much coffee (although I often find several cups unfinished... )

I am thankful that there are people in my life who consider Alvin and I (both alone and as a couple) to be a "safe" couple to talk to. I am thankful that these people are those we consider safe as well - and can share openly and honestly. We value the relationships and trust we have. God has given us many good friends. As Alvin and I reflected yesterday, over and above the friendships we shared this past week - there are several others who we consider gifts from God. (If you guys are reading this - I think you know who you are!)

Good communication is as stimulating as
black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after."

-Anne Morrow Lindbergh

1 comment:

christine said...

lots of thoughts i'd like to leave here, but i'll use bullets to be proficient!
-whenever a husband helps or initiates in a surprise dose of love and attention towards his wife...i want to celebrate!! love hearing/reading that kind of stuff!
- coffee is indeed a wonderful addition to any "heart to heart"'s a stimulant but the act of drinking the steaming goodness seems relaxing to me, or comforting? maybe i hold onto the mug for security? I'll leave that one for the psychoanalysts... :)but i too leave heaps of cold coffee around the house... demitasse sized cups may be a solution (but that wouldn't be as fun).
-you are blessed to have opportunities to meet with friends/family and have conversations with "substance". so often people don't feel "safe"(for real reasons), or shy away from sharing how they really feel...especially when it comes to church stuff. But i believe its in those exact conversations that we become a real community of believers, and can sometimes truly see what the Lord has planned for us. keep that coffee brewing!
and have a great day.