Tuesday, April 27


Regurgitation - it is kind of a gross concept - but a very necessary one especially in the animal kingdom. Today, I feel it is a necessary concept for myself ... and feel like REGURGITATING is needed! It is Tuesday, and I feel like I am just beginning to regurgitate what I heard at the Beth Moore Simulcast: "So Long Insecurity" which took place on Saturday.

At the beginning of the simulcast she said that we were not there by chance (in total among 800 and something sites, there were 300,000 women in all watching her either live at the site or via simulcast) and that God had something for us - if we would hear it and have the courage to listen and obey! She said "Don't let this be another day."

This morning I woke up - and then crawled back into bed... and then got up a couple hours later and felt not so good. I thought the 7 am start was too early, but let me tell you later did not feel better. I will admit it - I need to get some order to my life!

Yesterday as I walked and talked with the Lord, and wept... I gave him my stuff (what felt like for the millionth time!) Getting up today - feels like just another day. WOO EYE OPENER!!
Today must be different, if I believe HE is in control, that He cares about my life, and its stuff... Today is not just any other day!!

So, I pulled out my notes from Saturday. It is usually like that for me - I go, I listen, I take notes... then I go home, and let it settle then pull my notes out again later, and chew on it again (so to speak)... or "regurgitate!"

There were a number of things that she said, that hit home, such as:
"any time we need out of an area of bondage ~ it is us and God!"

"you have nothing to gain from your insecurity!"

"insecurity is not a weakness ~ it is unbelief!"

Jeremiah 9:20... "Listen, you women, to the words of the Lord; open your ears to what He has to say..."

O Lord, so often before I have hardly finished talking to you - I carry on with my own stuff... and having given my life to you, seem to snatch it back to do what I want, in my own strength! You O Lord, are speaking to me! Your WORD is living, it is truth ~ it is a light to my path~ Help my ears to be open to what you are saying! And, not just to hear, but to take the words you say to HEART and to apply it to my life! O Lord, hear my prayer!

Beth's sessions were based Ephesians 4:17-24 (New International Version)

Living as Children of Light
17So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. 18They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. 19Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.
20You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. 21Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. 22You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; 23to be made new in the attitude of your minds; 24and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

She talked about how we have a calling! That if we were poster children for "before and after" when it comes to before we walked in Christ and after... her question was: "Is there a marked difference?"

"We are meant to be free!!
We were meant to be SECURE - to the dept of the marrow of our bones!!"

That we need to remember how we were taught. (I thank God that I was raised in a christian home. I used to take that for granted! Gave my life to Christ when I was almost 8. I was given a foundation of faith which I am very thankful for!)

So... some of my inner questions were/are... I am meant to be free, so why do I feel like I am carrying around some things like a ball and chain? If I am meant to be secure right to the middle of my bones, then why do I struggle with insecurity.

Last night, our good friends Betty and Willy walked with us to the back of our property. On the way back, the boys were lagging back a bit - stopping to look at things. Betty and I came up to the "altar" that I had built as praise to God, in the back. As we stopped there, she read some of the stones. There was only one day that I actually took out a felt pen and wrote words on the stones. And one stone says INSECURITY! (hmm, who'd of thought!)

So Betty asked if that stone came out of last Saturday's session. To which I said, NO, that stone came out of a discussion last November.

Insecurity is such a big thing for us isn't it! But the Lord says "See, I am doing something new!" (The Lord gave this passage to me over and over and over again, as well as to another staff person, and also to some within our church ~ I think He was trying to get my and our church's attention! )

Isaiah 43:19-29 (New International Version)

19 See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland.

Beth said that she was going to divide her sessions on the following 6 Statements that describe a secure woman! (the following was said by Beth, and notes were taken down by me)

A secure woman is:

Saved from herself : (instead of being human beings "curved in" upon our self, when we are secure in Jesus - we are curved up to Him and then out to others!)

Entitled to truth: (Know the truth - Believe it and Walk in it! The last thing the enemy wants you to know is the truth!)

Clothed with intention! (We are clothed with strength and dignity! Put off the old you and put on the NEW you! You can't wait till you feel secure to believe what we have in Christ!)

Upended by Grace! (Grace turns everything upside down to the extent that we are willing to forgive! Nothing can hold us more than thinking we can never be forgiven from the past! It is no good to continue repenting over and over again. Did you already repent? Did you mean it? Then BELIEVE it!)

Rebounded by love! (if a heart does not heal - it hardens! You have to let God do it! When we know we are loved ~ we love. When we know we have been given a second chance ~ we give second chances to others. When we know we have been forgiven ~ we forgive. Everything always comes back to LOVE. I AM DEARLY LOVED BY GOD!)

Exceptional in life! (you are exceptional, you are blessed! Don't let the culture keep dictating! Let Christ OVERTAKE us!)


So much to think on, to regurgitate (bring back up) and digest again. The word is kind of gross when you think of it ~ but the meaning makes sense! So, that is what I am going to do today!


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